Ranma, meet Nintendo
by Inkhopper
Summary: After causing chaos at a D.E.A.D meeting, Pit activates a wormhole that sends him out of Pixelspace into the real worl. Specifically Japan. Specifically Nerima. NOTE: My first fanfic. Don't hurt me, please!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Nintendo, Sega or Ranma. You know who do.  
Also, this takes place around Ranma book two-three-ish.

Ranma, Pit. Pit, Ranma.

The D.E.A.D. council waited in silence for Bowser to speak. Everyone was on the edge of their seats.

Bowser let this moment linger a bit longer. He loved it when everyone did this. It reminded him of back home with the Koopas and Goombas.

He started to speak. "Fellow members of D.E.A.D.," He let his voice echo a bit for suspense, "You are probably wondering why I have called this meeting to order".

"Darn right we are, you turtle!" Nervous laughter bubbled through the audience.

Bowser sighed. _The only advantage to speaking to the Koopas, _he thought, _is they don't do that._

He continued. "Well, the reason is because I have concocted the greatest idea yet!"

"Oh, no you don't! Your last idea got us working for Tabuu, and we all know how that worked out!"

Everyone shivered from the memory of the Tabuu attack.

"Shut up!" Bowser now. "He was using Master Hand, so I didn't see him, okay?!"

"What? You could totally see him! But I guess since you're blind from age, I could let it pass this once…"

"Who's blind?"

"And deaf. And senile. And gushy over Princess Peach."

"Deaf, senile…WHAT? COME OVER HERE AND SAY THAT, PUNK!"

"Oh, so now Moldy Oldie is gonna get rough. What are you going to do, bite me with your dentu…"

In a couple seconds, there was a trophy where the annoyance had once sat.

Bowser continued like nothing had happened. "Before you I hold…The Dead Matter Converter!" In his hands he held what looked like a microchip with a gooey-looking end.

The audience murmured. "Dead matter converter?' a voice was heard saying, "isn't that for more…you know, M, R rated games? If so, it's _way_ out of my league."

Bowser groaned. "No, (_you idiots_) D.E.A.D. matter converter! I just didn't want to say all the letters!"

Once the room had quieted down, he spoke again. "My plan is (he cocked his head toward the trophy in case anyone else felt like blurting out) to use a very simple, very stupid race to destroy the heroes…HUMANS!

But before you say 'humans live on Earth, and we're in Pixel Space, so how can we get to them, yammer, yammer, yammer, THAT'S where the Dead Matter Converter comes in! You see, simply attach it to a surface with the gooey end (he stuck it to the wall to demonstrate), and then you…"

But whatever Bowser was saying was drowned out by the sound of shattering glass, the beating of wings and the firing of arrows.

Pit soared into the meeting room and dived toward the podium where Bowser was, firing arrows at everyone to pin them down to the ground.

Bowser was fuming. "WHAT? I thought I told the Hammer Bros to shoot down any hero they saw!"

Pit grinned. "They're tied up at the moment."

Two tied and gagged Hammer Bros then waddled into the meeting room, took one look at the damage, then waddled back out.

The hero pulled back his bowstring. "It's over, Bowser!" He fired.

But the Koopa dodged the arrow, causing it to fly into the Matter Converter, shattering it.

And before Pit could pull back his string…he vanished. No flash of light, no sound, just…vanished!

Bowser got up, brushed himself off, and turned to the pinned and bewildered audience. "As you see, if broken, the Converter creates a wormhole to Earth. But since that was my only one…meeting postponed!"

* * *

"AAAAUUUGGGHHH!!!!"

Pit could feel his feathers singe in the atmosphere. He tried to maintain altitude, but it was if his brain and his wings were disconnected at the time.

Below he saw a city. Not wanting to destroy anything or anyone, he doubled his efforts to gain control.

But just as he did, he landed on some nearby power lines.

He could feel as the electricity coursed through his entire body. Lights all around him flickered on and off. And then, something in his left wing went SNAP, and all went black.

_The next morning…_

"You take that back, Ranma!" Akane followed in close pursuit of the pigtailed boy.

Running backwards, Ranma stuck his tongue out at her.

Now Akane was at her boiling point. "Why you…who do you think I am?"

"Exactly what I said earlier, an un-cute tomboy who can't cook!"

Akane took hundreds of wild swings with her mallet with no avail, Ranma expertly ducked and jumped over every swing…

Until he tripped over something soft and heavy.

The sharp kick to the side was enough to wake Pit up. He opened his eyes to see a girl hit a boy with a mallet, making him fly into a lake, and after a moment, to see a girl emerge from the water.

Pit sat straight up, staring goggle-eyed at the girl. He blinked, squinted and rubbed his eyes 'till they stung, but the girl stayed just the same.

His wing burned with pain, causing him to whimper ever so slightly.

Akane heard the whimper of pain and turned around, and then it was _her_ turn to be goggle-eyed. A teenager in a tunic, with wings on his shoulders and a wreath of golden leaves around his head…well, it has the potential to…unnerve people.

Ranma walked up to the group. "Jeez, what were you doing in the middle of the road? Were you drunk or…"

Well, it certainly was an odd sight. A boy with angel wings looking at a redheaded girl, while being stared at by a girl with a mallet, while the redhead just kept talking, completely oblivious to the oddity of the boy.

It wasn't until she stopped talking that Ranma had a good look at Pit and said "Holy crap. Are those…wings?!"

Pit's mind was racing. _Girl is a boy. Is that a mallet? Did she hit him…her? Him or her? Oh, my brain…_

Pit panicked. In a blizzard of feathers, he stood up, jumped, and flew a good 10 feet before crashing.

The other two rushed over to him. Pulling him up, Ranma asked, "Are you okay?"

Pit opened his mouth, looked at her, and fell unconscious again.

Three hours later, Pit woke up. He was in a house, lying down on a makeshift mattress of three sheets with a boulder to support his head.

He looked around, but saw no one. No redheaded girl or mallet girl.

After a while, he sat up and looked at his left wing. It lay limply on the ground. Upon closer inspection, Pit noticed a long raw burn running along it.

In retrospect, he wasn't even in a house before he fell unconscious, so was it a dream? Unless they dragged him here…

He looked at his sandal's heels. There was a thick layer of dirt on them. No, unfortunately, it wasn't a dream. That's when he heard voices down the hall…

"So what do we do with him?" Akane asked at the miniature family meeting. Genma and Soun were out that day, so it only comprised of the Tendo girls and Ranma.

Kasumi spoke up. "I think it's dangerous that you brought him home. What if he's a drunk from a costume party? That would explain the wings…"

Ranma shook his (he had a hot water bath when he got home) head no. "Those are real wings. Akane and I saw him fly.

"Then perhaps you're drunk, then." Nabiki said. Her back was turned from the other two and was making something jingle.

"What do you have, Nabiki?" Akane asked.

In the other room, Pit dug in his pockets. Funny, the two golden bracelets that controlled his arrows were missing.

The screams of "YOU PICKPOCKET!" could be heard for miles.

Pit immediately put two and two together and rushed for the room. He didn't care who it was. Someone had stolen from a hero, and he was gonna make them pay.

The next thing happened very fast, so I'll describe it as well as I can. After Akane screamed, Pit rushed into the room. Seeing his rings, he held his right hand out. The rings shot from Nabiki's hands right to his own, and then he was out before anyone could react.

Akane looked at Kasumi. "Now, could a drunk do that?"


	2. Chapter 2

The meeting of T.H.R.I.V.E. gathered together at the Hall of Heroes.

Mario looked around at the small band of characters. "I have-a gathered you-a here today because-a of a state of emergency. Our espionage-a specialist Pit-a has gone missing-a on his infiltration of the-a meeting of the **D**astardly-a **E**vil **A**mbassadors of **D**igitals, or D.E.A.D."

A look of shock passed through the audience. Mario nodded solemnly.

"The footage-a you are about to see-a was-a what we obtained from-a the secret camera we attached to him." he said, gesturing to the screen behind him.

The screen flickered on, and a black and white video started. It showed Pit going to Bowser's castle, roping up the Hammer Bros, and listening to D.E.A.D.'s secret plan. And then the attack and then everything stopped. Static filled the screen.

Link was the first to speak. "So one of us must go to Earth, than!"

Popo the Ice Climber stared at him. "Now how could we do that?"

"Actually, I've-a got a copy-a of the converter here-a. Don't-a ask how I got it."

Now Nana spoke up "Than who would be dumb enough to do that?"

Link and Mario looked at each other. Than at the Ice Climbers. Than at each other again with a huge grin.

"Well, they-a have to be-a humanoid to blend in at Earth-a," started Mario. "Agreed," said Popo, "Human."

"It wouldn't hurt," Link said, keeping the train moving, "To be small to fit in small areas." "Undoubtedly," agreed Nana.

Both Mario and Link said at the same time "And to be safe, what about two of them?"

"Right. Human, small, two of them…GOOD GRIEF! YOU MEAN _US_?"

"Another world?"

"First things first. Tell me about him." Pit pointed at Ranma. "…Her. Him? Her? Gad, this hurts my brain."

Ranma gulped. _He's seen me transform_. _I have no choice but to tell him about it._

"A curse."

"A curse?"

"First things first. Tell me about this other world."

Pit grinned. "Touchy. We could use a guy like you in the T.H.R.I.V.E. forces.

"Thrive?"

"**T**roublesome **H**eroes of **R**ight, **I**mportant to **V**anquish **E**vil."

"Troublesome?"

"Do you always ask one-word questions?"

"What?"

"Never mind. Just think Robin Hood. There, I've talked about my world, now talk about your curse."

"I meant your entire world."

"Should've specified that."

Akane rubbed her temples._ We're getting nowhere fast._

So she took out her mallet, went up to Ranma in a classic croquet position, pulled back and…

WHOK! "HEY!" SPLOOSH!

Pit watched as female Ranma emerged from the lake. Akane grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt. "When splashed with cold water, he turns into a girl. Hot water reverses the effect. NOW TELL US ABOUT YOUR _we are experiencing technical difficulties. Please stand by...doop be doo...anyone know any lame jokes? Ah, here we go_-ING WORLD!"

Somehow, being yelled and swore at by a girl he's seen mallet someone twice, both times knocking a sixteen-year-old 12 feet away, kinda made Pit spill the beans.

"Alrighty, then, were do I start…Pixel Space is a alternate universe that was created by the power of your computers. The inhabitants are called digitals and take on a variety of species. And they're split three ways. They're called D.E.A.D. if they're evil. Nightmare, Eggman, and Bowser are D.E.A.D.

If they're kinda neutral, they're A.G.E. or **A**re you **G**ood or **E**vil. Innocent bystanders, slaves, and mindless soldiers are A.G.E.

And then, there's me and the other heroes. T.H.R.I.V.E. We work to defeat D.E.A.D., and keep A.G.E. from going all evil and stuff. Mario, Kirby, the Ice Climbers, Sonic, Luigi, the Pokémon Trainer and many more are T.H.R.I.V.E.

Anything else, your majesties?" Frowning, Akane asked, "If you're really from another universe, how did you get here?"

Pit squirmed uncomfortably. He knew it; this news would have to come out sooner or later. "Bowser is planning to use a matter converter to come to Earth and use humans as soldiers in his army to overthrow the Heroes. When I tried to stop them, my arrow smashed the converter, activating it, and…converted me."

Awkward silence filled the room. At least there was, until the sound of a door slam and two old voices filled the house.

"Crap, they're home!" Akane started pushing Pit into the attic. "C'mon, up, up, up"

"What? What is it?" "Never mind, just UP!" as she dropkicked him up the rest of the stairs.


	3. Chapter 3

"Have I mentioned this is crazy?" "Yes, yes you have."

Popo scrunched his nose "Than this time, I mean it."

The twin mountain climbers were taken out of their parkas and into more modern, Japanese-ish clothes. All the better to blend in. But they kept their mallets and the Condor. "It's embarrassing enough to wear this crap, so we're keeping our mallets."

"But how do we even know if we'll land where Pit is?" Nana of course. She's the more rational one of the two. "Don't-a worry. The place has the highest-a concentration of technology. You'll be sure to-a land-a there."

Link pulled back his bowstring to smash the converter with the arrow.

"But how will we get back?" Mario frowned in thought. "Actually, I-a didn't think-a about that." "WHAT?" Link fired.

* * *

"No-good, lousy…"

Apparently, the exact moment Link fired, China marketed a paper-thin computer that could fold, trumping Japan's technology level by half a level. So guess where the twins landed.

_Meanwhile in Japan,_

Pit had successfully done every Cat's Cradle he knew. The string was now slowly wearing itself out.

He made it look like Pac-Man eating a ghost (again) when Ranma poked his head up into the attic. "Okay, you can come down now…What the heck?"

All around Pit were hundreds of origami animals and buildings.

Pit saw what he was looking at. "Well, if you stuff me into an attic for eight hours that's filled with paper, what else would I do?"

"Well, anyway, the coast is clear and…is that Cat's Cradle?"

"Yes it is. What was that yesterday?"

"Well, our dads don't know about you, so we don't want them to freak out."

"Dad_s_? You all aren't related?" "Er, no…Akane's my…fiancée."

"…"

"What is it?"

"If she's your fiancée, why does she hit you with a mallet?" Ranma shrugged. "Dunno. I've gotten used to it though."

"I'll never understand women." "Don't worry. I'll never understand them either."

At the breakfast table, saw a bowl for him at the far end. He looked into it and saw it was filled to the brim with...

"Bird seed…is this some kind of sick joke?"

Kasumi squirmed uneasily, but Pit sat down and ate his seeds without much complaint.

Eager to change the subject, the oldest Tendo said "SO, Ranma, a letter came to you from your friend, Ryoga!" while taking out the envelope.

Ranma's face came down into his rice with an "Ugh…"

"Oh, and Pit? This letter came to you from…Popo and Nana…"

Pit snatched the letter and looked it over. Then his face came down with an "Oy…"

Akane stared at him in confusion. "Um, I can understand Ranma doing that, but what's wrong, Pit?"

"Popo and Nana are two of my great friends. They're professional mountain climbers and strict vegetarians. But it sounds like in order to get me back, T.H.R.I.V.E. sent them to Earth and they've landed in China."

"And how is that bad?"

"They have no clue how to get back. Oy."

"At last! Japan!"

The Ice Climbers had traveled across the ocean on the back of their red condor.

"Now, where to?"

Popo pulled out a map. "We've got to make it to Tokyo, which…is on…the other side…of Japan." He gave a sheepish grin to Nana.

Nana pulled out her mallet. "Well, I know a quick way to the other side."

"R-really? H-h-how?"

"THIS!" WHAMO! "AAAIIEEEE!"

"So when will those two get here?"

Pit looked at the clock. "Knowing Nana, about 9 seconds. So, who's this Ryoga?"

"W-what? Nine seconds?" Ranma stuttered in his confusion.

"5-you may want to stand back-3, 2, 1…"

THUD!

"Hey, Popo! Where's Nana?"

Popo counted down. "5, 4, 3, 2, 1…"

"Where are, you, Popo?" The Tendo girls and Ranma looked up to see a girl dressed in a mini kimono, riding a red condor.

Pit seemed impressed. "This is higher than her usual level of aggression. What did you do this time?"

"Is it my fault we landed on the other side of Japan? Even if I was steering, I was never here before!"

The somewhat-menacing figure leaped down from the condor. "Pit, just shut up" Pit shut up with a half-grin on his face. "And GET OVER HERE, YOU COWARD!"

With a pitiful "Eep!", Popo hid behind Akane. "Please don't let her come over here! Please-oh-please-oh-please-oh-who the heck are you?"

"Popo, Nana, this is Ranma, Akane, Kasumi and Pickpocket. Guys, These are the Ice Climbers. Geologists unit." Popo bowed, showing the monstrous lump on his head.

"Are you twins?" Ranma asked. They were twins, friends, or fiancées, and he thought the house wouldn't stand much more 'tough love'.

Nana grinned. "Yeah, we're twins. But I'm older. It's a technicality, but still…"

Popo asked the question that was on everyone's mind. "So…how do we get back?"

Complete silence. Then, "I've got it! What if we do something that could only happen in Pixel Space? Perhaps we'll default back!" Nana said.

"Great!" Popo. "So…what do we do?"

Evil eyes peered out from under Nana's hair. "How about we turn you into a trophy?" as she slowly pulled her mallet from it's halter.

"W-wait a minute. I didn't mean that. Th-think about this. I'm connected…"

WHAM! "I'm connected to you, Dosh Garbit!" the speck in the distance said.

Nana frowned. "Crap. I'm connected to him."

She turned into a ball of pale light which shot up to the speck, and both came down, unmoving, connected to a trophy base.

Pit stood up and walked over to it. After a poke and _very_ deep thought, he said "Nope. They're still here."

The Tendos and the Saotome looked in confusion and wonder at the statue. And why were Popo and Nana in Eskimo parkas?

Pit met their gaze and sighed. "Knew I should have warned them, just knew it…okay! Digital Biology lesson of the day!"

Everyone looked over at Pit, who had suddenly donned a lab coat and glasses and was gesturing toward a blackboard.

"Whenever a digital fights another, and the latter is at a point they can't stand it anymore, they go into a energy saving hibernation in the form of a trophy. In this form, a digital can remain dormant for all eternity until the base's rim is touched." All the time Pit was talking, chalk was writing on the board, showing two stickmen fighting each other and one turning into an intricate trophy.

Silence again. Then Pit asked "So, who is this Ryoga?"

Ranma's face came down with an "Ugh…"


End file.
